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your questions answered

how do you become a poet?

you write poetry. that's it. if you've ever written even one poem - no matter how good or bad you think it is - you're a poet. and if you love to do it, keep doing it! if you get something out of it every time you sit down and write, keep doing it! if you have even one positive reason to keep writing poetry, i say keep writing poetry!

do you think writing poetry is better for healing from trauma than therapy?

if i or anyone ever suggests to you that you should turn to art INSTEAD OF therapy, they are doing you a gross disservice. people who transform their pain into art without also going to therapy and working through their trauma with another human being end up creating a vicious sub-conscious reward system whereby their mind believes - on some level - that their creativity is dependent on their pain (this is where the "tortured artist" stereotype came from). once that happens, it can be extremely difficult to de-couple the two to create a sub-conscious awareness that the creative expression you love so much always come from YOU (and not from the pain itself).

how long will it take me to go through all 3 stages of healing?

everyone goes through all 3 stages differently, and in all honesty, there are several sub-stages of "pain" that some women will go through that others won't. if i've learned anything on my journey, though, it's to respect wherever you are (and however long you need to stay there) and to allow yourself to move through the stages only as it feels right to do so. you will naturally become interested in different topics and ideas at each of the different stages. don't force it and definitely don't shame yourself for being wherever you are.

are only women allowed to join your workshops?

yes. this is very important to me, as i believe when healing from trauma caused by men, creating a strong sense of safety is critical. i want the women who join the női lélek workshops to feel safe to express themselves honestly, to share their work (and if they want to, their stories) and to step into the power that comes with creating strong, emotionally-centered bonds with other women.

why don't you have any pictures of yourself on your website?

i am not interested in creating a cult of personality. if you want someone to idolize, then i suggest going somewhere else. i prefer to interact with people - especially, other women - as equals in every way. after a short career in social media influencing a few years ago, i realized just how quickly becoming someone's "follower" can turn into aspiring to mimic their entire life (and the more that's shared, the more there is to copy). some may disagree, but i believe this is the most toxic aspect of social media, as it doesn't encourage the celebration of everyone's unique individuality that is sorely needed in the world today. you're amazing, and all i want for you is to become even more wonderfully you every single day.

*i'll continue adding to this FAQ page as more questions come in from readers

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